I didn’t go to either of my appointments with the psychiatrist or CPN today. My Mum text me to ask if I wanted her to come with me and I didn’t reply. Tomorrow I have to arrange a repeat prescription, well I should really have done it today but my mind has been completely preoccupied with other things. Anyway I only have medication until tomorrow morning and then I’m all out. I’m hoping if I wake up early I can just go into the surgery and request one without actually having to see my GP.
I do like my GP, she is always lovely to me, but she will ask why I haven’t attended appointments and will want to know what’s going on in my head and I really don’t think I am able to talk about it with her. How do I explain to her everything that’s happening, the way people are able to read my thoughts and are delivering my thoughts to both the Lord and the devil so that I feel the full wrath of them. I don’t know how to tell her that I am now trying my best to shun the devil and obey the Lord and His Angels but I am a bad person, the devil reminds me of this repeatedly and he tells me he will win me over, he will make me just like him, filled with fury knowing that my time too is short.