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The song that never ends

Posted Nov 21 2008 3:09pm

It just goes on and on, my friends…

No, this one isn’t about the election, but the offspring. All three have a major date with destiny in the form of school officials/teachers/doctors this week; it’s going to be a tough one.

We’ve received the results of Little Miss’s evaluation by the school psychologist, and even though we knew she had the deficits, it really is harder to see it in black and white. Most of her age equivalent scores are between age five and six; seeing as she’s nine, this could be a problem.

Although, there is an accidental bright side. One day last week, I’d set out Ditto Boy’s ADD meds, awaiting his appearance at the table, and Little Miss helped herself, because “she had a cough and needed medicine.” After the initial panic, I thought about how the psychologist was always saying she thought part of Little Miss’s problem was that she had attention issues (although sometimes the other issues make it hard to know which direction the problem’s coming from, you know?). So I called the school and explained what happened, just so they could see if it mattered.

Well. They were overwhelmed. She did great all day. Of course that wasn’t one of the days they did her testing, darn it. So she’s got an appointment to see the meds doctor this week, to see if he thinks it will help on a regular basis.

Ditto Boy has a re-up on his meds, which his teacher says make a big difference for him. (He’d been off the first month for assorted reasons.) But we got a call to have a teacher conference anyway.  Uh-Oh.

But the major news, as usual, is the Captain. Yes, Captain Oblivious has ticked off a number of boys at school, I guess, to the point where he has to be walked to class by his teacher for his safety. His grades are falling, he’s back to not turning in his papers, and this week–a detention!!

We’d been so delighted he actually made a friend, one who invited him over after school to play–one in our neighborhood!! I think I noted earlier that we had some concerns because this boy and the Captain met on the special bus, but the teacher assured us he’d be all right as a friend. Well, apparently this friend has taught the boy how to flip someone off and also a number of interesting curse words, which the Captain then dropped on some young men who were supporting the other political candidate for president and caused a fight. Fabulous.

Doesn’t seem fair somehow, to make such a social triumph a social disaster at the same time.  We’re working through it with his mobile therapist, but she’s starting to run up against the same wall we have all these years–nothing motivates him.

She said to me last week that she’d worked with an older boy, a 15-year-old, and he was just the same. “That’s just the way they are,” she said. And while I keep hoping and praying that things will come around, I see the chorus coming at us again. We’ll continue singing it forever just because…

   Tagged: ADD, Asperger's, detention, evaluation, social skills, teacher conference, therapy   
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