I have been mia lately on the blog. My mom had knee replacement surgery last Friday. It did not go as planned or expected. Sometimes, I think God likes to throw a wrench in my expectations to see if I'll do what I know to do. Which of course is to drop to my knees in prayer.
Mom had hip replacement a few years ago. She sailed through it and by this point in recovery was walking around and joking. Not this time. She is still in a tremendous amount of pain. She barely eats. She has an infection and some clotting issues. We have already made an emergency run to the hospital because her leg swelled up HUGE and the Dr was worried about blood clots.
What makes this different too is that she is not staying with me this time around. When she had the hip replaced, she lived with me for a year so that I could help Dad take care of her. This time though, I have to travel to her house. This is really a strain on me and my family. Of course, it is one that we are more than happy to make for our beloved Nana. The children and I are staying at her house from 9-5 every day and Dad has her in the evening. We do our lessons here. We make her meals and put dinner in the oven for later. (Dad has to eat too!). But , we don't get to see Michael (our dad) unless it's his days off. The children miss him and so do I.
Another thing that makes this different is that Mom and I have drawn close. I have always been close to my dad. About a year ago, I consciously decided to enrich my relationship with my mom. It has not always been easy for the two of us to get along. But, I really felt convicted in my spirit that I needed to show her the love of Christ. That I needed to love her just like He loves me. So, I began spending more time with just her. I found things that interested the both of us and invited her along. You know what? It really wasn't that hard. We share some pretty similar interests like we both think that my kids are awesome! lol
As the knee complications began, I had to face my mom's mortality. She is not going to be around forever. One day, I will have to face this world without her. That was a hard thing to realize. I love her immensely. But I will take solace in the fact that she will be with Jesus in heaven. But I'm not ready for that yet.
Mom, I love you more than you will ever know! You have always been there for me even in our darkest hours of autism. You showed me how to serve others selflessly. Above all, you have shown Logan love and affection despite his inability at times to love back. You make him feel so special when he is with you like he has no problems . You love Madison differently than Logan but that's ok. She knows that you love her just as much as Logan . You just show it in a different way. She literally beams with pride when she tells people that her nana made her dress. Our lives would not be the same without you. You hold a vital place in our heart. We pray that you get well soon. Until then, we are honored to return the favor and take care of you!