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On Mother's Day

Posted May 08 2010 11:11pm
The name Evan is of Gaelic origin, and means God is good.

I did not cry when I was given the diagnosis that my son was autistic, that came later. For the next 16 years the tears would come at different times. Hard and fast, rooted in frustration and anger...the unfairness of it all. The pity party of one asking God "Why me", when the answer was "Why not you?" The silent slow tears of a proud mother, amazed at his ability and determination to want to be just a regular boy. The many tears of guilt that I cried, starting deep within and coming out in wails as my marriage collapsed around me because I was in the middle of my husband and child and didn't know which way to go. The tears of gratitude when he forgave me and said I did the best I knew how, given what I was handed, trying to create a family for him.

My son is a miracle. It is a miracle that I was able to even conceive a child at all, knowing what I do now. And I gave him the name Evan, and the meaning of the name fits him well. For he is my gift. Not only on Mother's Day, but every day of my life. And especially now that he has a job at Target...I can use his discount. I know he loves me...that is the ultimate proof right there.

Happy Mother's Day to all my friends that also are blessed with their own gifts from God.

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