Last night my friend Shar and I went to Rockband Live in Concert featuring Dashboard Confessional, Panic at the Disco, Plain white T’s, and some unknown loser band called The Cab (who played WAYY too many songs if you ask me). Since marrying John we haven’t been to many concerts. We went to Def Leppard last year which was SO much fun and The Wiggles which was also So much fun. But John and I have differing taste in music so we don’t get to go to many things I like. When I heard Dashboard was coming I had to get tickets. I’ve loved Dashboard since before they were a band. I saw them play in a dingy Utah Bars where tickets were $7.I also have a a huge sloppy crush on Chris Carrabba.
I should have known what I was getting myself into when I bought the tickets to a show called “Rockband Live”. That should have been a dead giveaway to the types of people who would show up. Those people being no one over the age of 13. I think I saw 10 people who were old enough to buy beer. These weren’t cool 13 year olds either. These were nerdy fat teens with braces. Nothing says “You have bad taste in music like a bunch of nerds in floral skirts”.
We had general admission tickets and the spots we had secured by arriving an hour early were slowly drifting further and further back as punk ass teens literally busted there way through to the front. We had to listen to The Cab first and witness 13 year olds going crazy for cheesy lyrics like “Bounce Bounce baby, Bounce back to me”. Shoot me. Next was the Plain White T’s and I don’t know any of their songs except for “Hey there Delilah”. So I just listened to the rest of their crap until it finally came around to that song. When it did the kids went crazy and one chick honestly tried to start a mosh pit. To Hey there Delilah…definitely a moshing style song. Uh huh.
Just when I thought the time had come for Dashboard to take the stage, they instead had people come up and play rockband live. Yes, I watched a bunch of dorks killed the song “my own worst enemy” by Lit. I paid $50 to watch people play rockband. The question has to be asked WTF?
FINALLY! FINALLY! Dashboard comes out and apparently not only the old people like myself love them, because every person charged to the front practically knocking us on our asses. We were standing elbows to assholes and I couldn’t take in a breath without breathing in the kid next to me’s Axe body spray. Bad became really bad when these three girls who can’t be more then 16 come running through and crash right into my friend Shar, forcing the space between everyone to get tighter. They then proceed to stand in front of us and dance around like a bunch of douche bags running into everyone around them because THERE IS NO ROOM. They then try to body surf and knock down a few people. Eventually they get so rowdy that they engage the once contained anger management problem my friend Shar has.
And thus begins the story of how at the age of 26, Shar and I have to leave a concert early so we don’t end up in jail.
Shar unleashes her fury on these bitches. She was in there face screaming that the rest of us spent money to come here and have a good time and we weren’t having a good time with them playing the part of the fool. Except she didn’t use say it quite like that and she included a few choice words, here’s a hit it starts with a C and rhymes with Bunt. The girls try to get up in her face but Shar is like Sasquatch tall and eventually intimidated them into backing down.
Of course one of these skanks decides to booty clap Shar as hard as she can and knocks Shar right on her ass. Word to the wise, never mess with Shar. EVER. Shar gets up, grabs this girl by her hair and forces her to the ground. She gets on top of her and proceeds to explain how she’d be “happy to go back to jail for kicking her ass”. Her little friend tried to jump on Shar but I held her back. The other girl was screaming for security. The girl on the floor under Shar was crying saying she was going to get the cops. Shar replies to the threats with “Well if I am going to be in trouble anyway, I might as well get in a few good punches”.
I grabbed Shar and told her we better go before I have to bail her ass out of jail. Needless to say we ran out of there as quickly as we could.
I left feeling tired, deaf, old, and like I can’t take my best friend anywhere without a fight breaking out.