There are lots of things you learn when you become the parent of a special needs kid. You learn patience, you learn to fight - HARD, you learn unconditional love, and you learn to ignore the unsolicited advise from the parents of NT kids. And lots more. I can't remember what else, because you also learn that you have no memory because you've learned to live with very little sleep.
But, I've realized lately that AJ is teaching me lots about myself.
1. I am a drama queen
I learned this one when AJ was helping me pick out frames for my glasses
Me: "AJ, I've narrowed it down to two choices. Which one do you like?"
AJ: "That one, Mama. Because they are dramatic, just like you. Because you are a drama queen!"
Sadly, he was right. And I love those frames!
2. I have spit bubbles in my mouth
Apparently, when I open my mouth just a little, like to do something annoying like breathing, you can see "disgusting little spit bubbles in my teeth". Ewwwwwww.
3. I have gross sweaty arm pits
I had just finished working out downstairs (no more gym for me - I just can't get up at 5:00 anymore and pay for the privilege of doing that - I work out at home now). Normally, I shower right after that, but I was so hungry, I decided to eat breakfast first. AJ was eating breakfast too.
AJ: (top volume) "MAMA, TURN SIDEWAYS, I CAN SEE YOUR ARMPITS WHEN YOU SIT LIKE THAT!!!!"
OK, I was confused. Did we move to a country where it is indecent for a woman to show her armpits???
Me: "Ummm, OK. But why?"
AJ: "Because your arm pits are sweaty, and it's disgusting. I'm trying to eat here!"
Just try not to laugh. Go ahead, I dare you. It's just funny!
4. I'm not a teenager, and I shouldn't dress like one
AJ and I were getting ready to go swimming. I normally wear a one piece. I'm 44 years old (almost), and I've had a child. Some things should not be seen in public. But, that suit had not dried (we swim ALOT), so I have an emergency bathing suit. That one has a sports bra type top and LONG trunk bottoms. Trust me, not much was showing. I'm not exactly a flasher.
AJ: (top volume) "WHAT ARE YOU WEARING??"
Me: "Ummm, my bathing suit?"
AJ: "Mama, some things really should just be for teenagers. Don't you think you're a little old for a bikini?"
Me: "Well, it's not really a bikini, AJ..."
AJ: "MAMA, I CAN SEE YOUR (whispering) stomach"!!
Heaven help us. A 40+ stomach seen in public. Alert the media!! :-)
5. I give "wet blubbery" kisses
AJ doesn't like kisses. Never did. Even as a baby. Really hard kisses are OK, soft kisses - not so much. So I was giving AJ hard kisses, just playing with him. Suddenly:
AJ: "Mama, no more kisses!"
Me: "OK, why not? Too soft?"
AJ: "No, too wet. For God's sake, Mama - dry your lips before you kiss someone. Noone likes wet blubbery kisses, you know!"
6. However, despite my many flaws, too numerous to list:
AJ: "Don't worry, you're still a pretty good Mama. I love you!!"