This week I have an aversion to my blog. I actually kind of hate the premise of this blog. Because basically, the premise is that I have a disease that sets me apart so much that it warrants a blog. A damn blog. But that’s just not it. Asthma sucks a lot and I wish I didn’t have it and I know it sucks a lot for all of you as well. But it’s just that I can’t believe I have written hundreds of posts about this beast. In terms of how much space asthma occupies in my conscious brain, it’s probably equivalent to a little fleck of pepper in a giant bowl of vietnamese soup. Hey, I’m normal! I have green eyes and brown curly hair. I have a sister and a brother. I enjoy drinking tea, seeing live music, skiing, and being a goofball. I’m tall-ish, I have bunions, and cream of mushroom soup makes me gag. Oh yeah, and I like school a little too much for my own good.
If you spent a day with me, you’d probably learn all of these things and more, but you might only catch a fleeting glimpse of my asthma. And that’s the way I like it. It’s on days that the above statement is not true that I feel the most down about my health. And if that were to ever change for good, that’s when I would feel like I have actually lost something. My relationships with others are what matter most to me, and as long as I can keep those relationships at the centre of things I am happy.
I don’t really know what I’m saying except that I have an aversion to blogging about asthma right now because I don’t want to be special because of freaking asthma. It’s not special, it’s just a thing. There are lots of other things that make me special and even more things that make me completely boring. If I write anymore about this then I will feel like I am blogging about asthma again and that will make me even more irate so I had better just go to bed. Good night!
PS just because I am irate about this for no good reason doesn’t mean I love you all any less.