I’m so bitter about health care right now. I’m so bitter that my worth as a human being and the amount of treatment available to me is based on the amount of paper in my wallet.
My feet are really bad because of the years my legs were messed up. Now I can’t stand more than a few minutes without a large of pain. Just like before the surgery.
They want seven hundred dollars for custom foot inserts. Nothing else has worked and my insurance wont cover it.
I started a new medicine called Rituxin. I havent seen any improvement. My doctor wants me to try a combination of Rituxin and Humira but my insurance wont cover it. What if my hands go like the rest of my body? They hurt so bad all the time. I find myself just staring at my swollen fingers. Terrified that they’re going to be irreparable like my knees and hips and elbows. Every day I just imagine the amount of cartilage that was destroyed that day.
On top of that, my right knee is already grinding down after only 6 months because of the position of my hips and knee. I will probably have to have it repaired. But my surgeon is in no hurry to do it. He wants to exhaust all other options. At this point I don’t see myself being able to go to school next semester.
Oh, and I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. She pressed several points on my body and they were so tender I yelped. My body hurts all over to the touch.
I feel like I’m falling apart. I’m so frustrated right now. I’m so disgusted with this country’s health care system. How can anyone be proud to live in a country that lets a 20-year-old woman suffer from a disease with no medical treatment until she has suffered so much irreversible damage that she will feel the effects for the rest of her life? How can this still be happening?
I want to give up. I’m so tired. I’m so unbelievably tired of all of this. And I feel so powerless.