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1December 3, 2009How to put your foot in your mouth

Posted Dec 03 2009 12:00am

I have a problem; I am brutally honest. I can’t help it, I always have been. I am probably not as brutally honest as Simon Cowell (American Idol) is, but I am in fact brutally honest. (Actually, Simon Cowell would make me look like a pussy cat.-the Puss in Boots from the Shrek movies pussy cat.) Quite often, I end up putting my foot in my mouth because I am brutally honest. At work, I try to maintain a different attitude, probably a cowering one, if you ask me, but nevertheless, I try to be professional.

What made me this way? Now, I am not going to jump and say that it was my upbringing, but being the second of seven children, you learn survival or you fall. My parents were strict and religious and I did not necessarily fall into that category. Actually, if anything, I was my parents’ worst child, and not because I was trouble maker either. It was because I always followed my heart and not necessarily what my parents preached. Because of that, I had to survive in the way any first generation American would, either follow the pack or make my own rules. I choose to make my own rules, and because of that, I had to learn to be a survivor.
If anything, I am my biggest critic, and while I always try to be more supportive of my children, I do find myself pushing them to be the best. I think that you have to always strive to be the best if you want to survive, and perhaps others would disagree here. I always try to be better whether it is in my career, in my life, as a mother, and even when it comes to my health. Since my RA diagnosis, I have somewhat tried to slow down, to be more laid back, to be more supportive of others, to keep my opinons to myself, and to look at the world (my world) more clearly. In the process of doing so, I have learned how often I used to put my foot in my mouth, and in past, I really didn’t care, but lately, I do.

So, if you really want to put your foot in your mouth, and be brutally honest, here’s how you do it, and it’s quite easy.

1. Look at people’s personal features; for example, how they are dressed. Go ahead and point things out. For example, if a dress looks horrible on someone, let them know. (“That dress makes you look like a whale.” Or you could take a more sensitive role, “Don’t wear that dress again. Actually, you should burn it.”) Now, wasn’t that easy?

2. Gossip loudly within an ear’s reach of someone so they can hear it.

3. Always say the first thing that pops in your head, and don’t filter anything. The more you do it, the better you will get. You will start saying things without even realizing it.
On a serious note, these days I don’t put my foot in my mouth as often as I used to, but if something just doesn’t seem right to me, like this blog post on respect , I will say something, and well, the offended need to get over it. That is just me. I suppose I have become a kinder, gentler soul…okay, well I am trying to be nicer and trying to somewhat keep my foot out of my mouth, and telling my boss that most people find her intimidating does not help my case either. Wait until reviews come out! No raise for me.

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For some tips on children your children organization skills , please come by and check out my latest Examiner Cleveland article.

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