My classes that I loved going to have been less frequent. More so because my friends seem to have moved on from their sudden interest in keep fit, and they no longer go. This means i need to go alone, and although i have done it a few times, its much easier to say i cant be bothered when i know I'm not letting anyone down. but I'm letting myself down. I really love my classes, its a bit of adult time for me and a little break from the demands of kids, and so I'm going to make a point of doing more. Its not as easy doing it alone, but ill try my best. You would think this would leave me even more tired but actually it give me more energy.
Ive still not had much of a social life and obviously I'm at home every night with Nathan but i know this needs to change. I need to look into getting a sitter and having the odd night out. I know it will do me good, perk me up. We all need some time out, and so ill sort it out... eventually. I have a christening to attend in 2 weeks so that's something to look forward to (or worry about). Lots of adults having fun, obviously i could take Nathan but i think for that day ill give myself a break and relax! However, its at the edge of my comfort zone and ill probably find it hard to 'relax' but ill soon settle.
Speaking of christenings, Nathan has never been christened. I'm not a regular church goer by any means, but i do have my beliefs and so it seemed natural that when Nathan was born he would be baptised like most babies. Unfortunately, due to the state of my relationship last year, i was in no frame of mind for it, things were far too messy. But i always regretted that it hadn't happened. And although this year things aren't much better, i decided that its been long enough. I contacted the local church and now i am just waiting on a date. It wont be a big event like christenings are these days. Loads of friends and family in the church followed by a big knees up somewhere. It will be much smaller, with just a handful of us, no big party. Just me and my son at the alter doing what i should have done long ago and I'm really looking forward to it.
So i guess this is why theres been a bit of a break in writing. Ive made no big breakthroughs, felt there was nothing of great significance to tell you. Could beat myself up about what I've NOT been doing, but while I'm actually sitting here writing this, i realise theres a lot i HAVE been doing. Hopefully my next post will be far more focused on over coming a few obstacles. On that note i bid you farewell, hope you all doing great and i am off to the land of nod. Oh do you have agoraphobic dreams? I always do. I'm always far away and trying to get home. Not anxious, just in a hurry hmmm. xxx