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I feel a bit silly but...I need some help

Posted by Shirley

Hi everyone, I just joined today after I found the site whilst trying to find any information that might help me with my 'problem'. 

I feel a bit silly really...but then I guess there are lots of other people out there who seem to struggle with the same things I perhaps it's not so silly after all. I don't know.

Anyway, I was just wondering...does anyone have any good advice, or know of anywhere where I can get some advice, on how to get over 'worrying so much'.

Let me explain....I've always been a worrier & an the point where I pretty much locked myself in the house and refused to answer the door, phone, or check my mail. Having 4 kids made it very difficult to keep it a secret I tell you...but I have a wonderful hubby who helped me (and still helps me) through it all. I'm not 'over it' completely...and I still avoid the door, phone & mail box as much as possible but I've definitely improved..especially since I was offered a job a couple of years ago on 'one of my few' trips out of the house to buy some much needed clothes. It's only 1 day a week and it's working in a clothes shop with the public, which can be quite hard some days...but that job has saved me in so many ways. I really don't know what I'd do without it now. I still over think everything of course and I take things to heart far too easily. I seem to get effected by things when others don't...which is something else that really annoys me about myself. :OP

What has brought me to the internet for advice though is something that has just happened recently...Wednesday actually. Let me explain..I've always loved art..ever since I was very little...and I've always wanted to 'one day' do something with it...but I've also always been very afraid. I've talked about enrolling in classes for forever!!!...but I never actually go and do anything about it because I'm too scared.

Anyway, Wednesday was my birthday and my wonderful hubby decided he was going to make the decision for me...he enrolled me in a creative art/drawing class. It only goes for 8 weeks...3 hours every Wednesday...and it started on my birthday. When I found out I instantly started panicking! I felt sick all day!

When I got to the art class I was shaking...that badly that I could hardly put my pencil on the paper. I felt like I was going to be sick the whole time. I couldn't think. I couldn't talk. I wanted to burst into tears. I just wanted to run out of there. I hated every minute of it! When my hubby arrived to pick me up I was so relieved. I spent the rest of the night at home in tears feeling very upset with myself....I felt so stupid! I mean it's something I've always wanted to do!!! Why couldn't I just relax? Why does it have to be such a big deal??? Why do I have to get so anxious?

Now I'm stressing big time about next weeks lesson and I don't know what to do to change the way I'm feeling. I feel so sad...and angry with myself! I really want to do this but I'm terrified I'm going to be like this every time.

Does anyone have any suggestions??? Has anyone else experienced anything like this?  If so, how did you get through it? I'd really appreciate any advice.

Thank you...from a frustrated artist wannabe

Shirley  :o) 


Answers (1)
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Ian Health Maven
Hi Shirley,

You are not silly or stupid, Shirley. Any illness than can confine you within the 4 walls of home and prevent you enjoying life is very serious.

I wish I had an easy answer that will enable you to breeze through the art lesson next Wednesday, but unfortunately, there is very little that is easy about anxiety disorders.

If you wish to regain control then you've already taken the first step by recognizing there is a problem. The second one is to seek medical help.

Depending on your circumstances, your doctor will probably recommend either medications - benzodiazepines such as Valium, or an antidepressant, a cognitive/behavioral psychotherapy such as CBT, or both drugs and therapy.

One of the benzodiazepines may be enough to get you through the art classes, however, doctors are becoming increasingly reluctant to prescribe them and you'll most likely be offered an antidepressant. For long term problems, and I believe yours is, antidepressants have advantages over benzodiazepines, though probably not as many as doctors seem to believe. Unfortunately, it can take anywhere between 2 and 12 weeks for an antidepressant to begin working, and there is no guarantee that the first one you try will be effective. It take take a while and several attempts to find the right one.

The CBT type therapies are about as effective as antidepressants but require more effort than drugs and will also take time to work. They can be more expensive than antidepressants/benzodiazepines and finding a therapist experienced in anxiety may be difficult outside cities and larger towns.

So, unfortunately, I have no magic solution. But with time and effort you can regain control of your life. And, IME, taking the time and making the effort IS worthwhile!

Best wishes


NOTE: I am not a doctor, and more importantly, I'm not your doctor so the above advice is necessarily of a general nature which may or may not apply to you. Always consult your health provider before acting on anything you've read here. 

NOTICE: The information provided on this site is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Never delay or disregard seeking professional medical advice from your physician or other qualified health provider because of something you have read on Wellsphere. If you have a medical emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately.
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