Even when my ass was falling off.
There were a couple of nervous moments, but I realized even before they occurred that they would be caused by my social anxiety, which USED to be alleviated by drinking, and that it might be tough, but armed with the right tools, I could get through them.
That's pretty much a part of everyday life out in the real world. I've had to become accustomed to blushing when I can't find my wallet in the checkout line, getting tongue-tied at the bank teller's window, and babbling incoherently when asked if I can be helped by retail store personnel.
Granted, it's better when I'm on Cymbalta, but the anxiety and awkwardness are never totally gone, and I'm never completely at ease in any social setting beyond my immediate family (meaning my husband and my cat). Even my family of origin, all of whom I adore, can be tough to be around, especially all at once.
I know I was stupid and headstrong to do this. I knowingly put myself in a potentially dangerous situation.
But it was a challenge I felt I needed to face.
And I DID IT!!
So, nah-nah-nah-nu-nu-stick-your-head-in-doo-doo to everyone who was sure I'd fail, and THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart to all who prayed for me and cheered me along the way.
I love you all. M-U-A-H!!