For I am persuaded beyond doubt (am sure) that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor thingsimpending and threatening nor things to come, nor powers,Nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. ( Romans 8:38-39 AMP)
A common mistake we make when we quote this particular scripture is that we say “nothing…can separate us from God” when in fact, it’s that nothing can separate us from the LOVE of God. Splitting hairs? Yeah, I know. God is love and therefore if we cannot be separated from the love of God which is in Christ, then we cannot be separated from God. It’s an easy jump and probably one safely made.
But some of us (*cough* me in particular *cough*) like to wander in areas God has clearly marked dangerous. Some of us…(me)…like to stroll through the valley’s of our death, we like to flirt with principalities previously vanquished, we like to settle at the depths of our pits. All the while thinking to ourselves (myself) that God can’t see into these wastelands. (This is where He found us in the first place, before we came to know Him, so how do we justify thinking He’s not going with us now?)
I don’t know why I do that. I don’t know what gets into me that I think that I can handle these situations on my own. But when I find myself in darkness, it’s a comfort to know a few things about His grace.
God has graced me with so much. The ability to overcome, the ability to recover, the ability to walk freely and unbound by drink, depression or despair. All that is good, and I am grateful beyond my vocabulary for it. But what brings me to my knees, what awes and humbles and amazes me beyond the facts of my salvation and victory is how He moves through me even in darkness.
If I have been light to you in any way, dear internet, it’s because God will not let me go. He will not let me wander alone in those dark areas. It’s because once His, I’m always His, no matter what. What He loves is His forever.
Grace is the measure that makes all things work for the good for those who love Him and are called. So my pit-dwelling, darkness wandering times will continue to carve out areas in me that He will use. I think, honestly, He’s recently carved out a huge chunk of my “recovery pride.” He’s given me a heaping helping of humility by bringing me to the limits of my ability. Where my ability stops…His grace takes off.