Are you a caregiver to an elderly or disabled relative or friend? Might that occur down the road for you or your partner?
I interviewed Pamela Pope of the Pope Institute to learn more about what services are availble to make that a more smooth and satisfying experience for the caregivers and those who need care.
Pope offers a wide range of elder care services, including consultation with families nation-wide. She impressed me as being an articulate, thoughtful, and resourceful woman who entered this specialty early in her career. An occupational therapist by training, she has the expertise to evaluate a dependent individual's needs. She looks at the tasks that "occupy" their days (that's where the term "occupational therapy" comes from) to determine how to keep that person as independent as possible. She keeps ancillary health professionals accountable and acts as an impartial advocate. She's an ombudswoman.
Pope's and most aging people's goal, is for people to "age in place" in their own home or in a residential community. Pope educates families about how to make that happen. What accommodations do they need to make? How much money will it cost? What neighborhood or family caretakers are reliable and available to supplement or replace hired staff? What are the needs of the aging person as he or she moves on in life? People most at risk of aging in place are those who have little money and/or caretaker support and they often have to choose nursing homes, a last resort for many people.
I asked Pope how she counsels people to manage a family member who isnsists upon doing things that endanger themselves or others, like driving, or continuing to cook when losing eyesight.
"Don't sabotage your credibility," she says. She tells a story of a client who told her mother "there are no batteries for your car anymore." So, mom promptly looked in the Yellow Pages, called a battery store and got the battery she needed. Who won that battle? No one.
"You learn more from listening," says Pope. This applies to all people attending to the needs of the elderly. Many of us get exasperated, so we treat our elderly relatives with disrespect, further causing them to dig in their heels to maintain control. They're being "more directive than supportive."
Instead of directing, ask your relative: What do you want? How should we accomplish that" What are your ideas?
A consultant, author of a new book called Retirement Life By Design: Living Well with Health, Wisdom, and Authenticity; Achieve Aging in Place, Manage Elder Care, Master Caregiving, and an active seminar leader, both online and in-person, Pamela Pope is one of those scarce resources that we could have more of in this time when many of us are looking toward caring for aging relatives. Don't worry...I get no kickback from my recommendation!
Let me know what dilemmas you struggle with about aging family members. Comment here or email me at karma@LifeSpringCoaching.com
Are you a caregiver to an elderly or disabled relative or friend? Might that occur down the road for you or your partner?
I interviewed Pamela Pope of the Pope Institute to learn more about what services are availble to make that a more smooth and satisfying experience for the caregivers and those who need care.
Pope offers a wide range of elder care services, including consultation with families nation-wide. She impressed me as being an articulate, thoughtful, and resourceful woman who entered this specialty early in her career. An occupational therapist by training, she has the expertise to evaluate a dependent individual's needs. She looks at the tasks that "occupy" their days (that's where the term "occupational therapy" comes from) to determine how to keep that person as independent as possible. She keeps ancillary health professionals accountable and acts as an impartial advocate. She's an ombudswoman.
Pope's and most aging people's goal, is for people to "age in place" in their own home or in a residential community. Pope educates families about how to make that happen. What accommodations do they need to make? How much money will it cost? What neighborhood or family caretakers are reliable and available to supplement or replace hired staff? What are the needs of the aging person as he or she moves on in life? People most at risk of aging in place are those who have little money and/or caretaker support and they often have to choose nursing homes, a last resort for many people.
I asked Pope how she counsels people to manage a family member who isnsists upon doing things that endanger themselves or others, like driving, or continuing to cook when losing eyesight.
"Don't sabotage your credibility," she says. She tells a story of a client who told her mother "there are no batteries for your car anymore." So, mom promptly looked in the Yellow Pages, called a battery store and got the battery she needed. Who won that battle? No one.
"You learn more from listening," says Pope. This applies to all people attending to the needs of the elderly. Many of us get exasperated, so we treat our elderly relatives with disrespect, further causing them to dig in their heels to maintain control. They're being "more directive than supportive."
Instead of directing, ask your relative: What do you want? How should we accomplish that" What are your ideas?
A consultant, author of a new book called Retirement Life By Design: Living Well with Health, Wisdom, and Authenticity; Achieve Aging in Place, Manage Elder Care, Master Caregiving, and an active seminar leader, both online and in-person, Pamela Pope is one of those scarce resources that we could have more of in this time when many of us are looking toward caring for aging relatives. Don't worry...I get no kickback from my recommendation!
Let me know what dilemmas you struggle with about aging family members. Comment here or email me at karma@LifeSpringCoaching.com