One of the alleged characteristics of someone with ADHD is that they tend to speak their mind without a filter. For the record, I’m not really sure how this is a bad thing. In fact - it’s one of the traits I love most about people.You always know where you stand. But apparently, it frustrates a lot of people…
[Sidebar]:I hate using these wordssymptoms,struggle, anddeficitin describing people that inspire me every single day. It just doesn’t make sense.
Anyway, I was speaking with an incredibly talented professional woman, who is focused on completing a very large goal, and one of her challenges was knowing when to speak her mind and when to take feedback and advice without response.
For me, this is a very sensitive topic for the reason I stated above. Speaking your mind and letting people know where you stand is a verypositive trait.
Unfortunately, not a lot of people tend to see this in a positive light. In fact, I don’t think most people are “taught” this in life. Rather we are taught to bite our tongues or listen to authority without standing up for ourselves and advocating.
Ok - well maybe I am being a little general here - and that’s okay for these purposes.
The challenge really is aboutdistinguishingwhen it is the right time to:
Speak your mind
Take a stand
Let things go
So how do you know?
There is really no specific answer. At least I won’t make sweeping claims. Instead, I will suggest questions to consider because the path you take really depends on your goal in the end.
What is your end goal?
Who are you dealing with?
If you speak up, how will it directly benefit you? (Think values, morals, personal integrity)
Is itreallyworth fighting for?
What is the worsts that can happen?
Figuring out when to speak your mind (or when to bite your tongue) is really an art that must be carefully crafted throughout the course of life. There are times when it works, and times when it does not. The trick here is knowing when to teach your children how it will benefit them.
And as adults, we need to consider what we really want. While speaking my mind comes naturally, it does get me in trouble with some people.But I know that and I’m okay with it.
That’s the delicate balance… For the individual with attention deficit disorder - we are more accustomed to negative feedback - so why bring more upon ourselves?