This morning when I was at my mom's, she asked me, "What do you want for your thirtieth birthday?" My answer? "I want to not turn thirty!" I know that a lot of people don't want to turn thirty. Diana, who is six months younger than me, complains about it all the time. Thirty just sounds scary, for some reason, when you've always been in your twenties or younger! But for me, its different. See, my friends who have turned thirty or about to, don't like it because they think it makes them feel old. but they're already living as adults. They have homes, and children, and careers, and regular lives. They can handle themselves with maturity, confidence and poise. (Poise, ugh, I hate that word! Luckily, its something I'll never have!) My friends who are turning thirty don't sit and rock when they are upset or anxious. they don't pace the floors or bounce against the walls to calm themselves. They don't have trouble finding words when they talk to people. They don't stammer and look away. They don't walk out of a room to avoid talking to a group of friends and family members because the sight of so many people at once overwhelms them. They don't avoid parties because they can't dance and the loud music hurts their ears. My friends don't still get yelled at by their parents for being messy. Nobody tells them that they musn't sleep on the couch downstairs, where their cat sleeps, because they will wrinkle the blankets. Nobody tells them they musn't sleep with the TV on, or that they must eat something other than cheddar cheese sandwiches, or that they need to get off the computer. Nobody questions them on how much money they're making, tells them to stop hanging out with their friends, or demands to read their mail. Nobody looks at them with disgust and says. "You're thirty years old! Act it!" Some of my friends look young for their age, and when they meet new people, they might hear, "You're thirty? I thought you were more like twenty!" But nobody starts laughing or choking and saying, "I thought you were about twelve! You're thirty? Seriously? Thirty? Whats wrong with you?" Every year it gets more and more embarassing to tell people my age. But telling them I'm thirty is going to be the worst!