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ADHD Family Relationships: Overlooking What Counts Most

Posted Jan 14 2009 5:07pm

I’ve said many times before that ADHD is bigger than just the child who is diagnosed.  ADHD is a diagnosis that is bigger than one person, it’s bigger than a family, and it’s bigger than the relationships we have with others.

There is plenty of research to suggest many different outcomes of the impact ADHD has on the family, on marriage, on divorce, school, the workplace, and more…  Honestly, you name it - and they’ve likely researched it when it comes to ADHD.

But We Are Still Overlooking So Much

Despite the far reaching grasp that ADHD has on an individual - the family - and the world, we are still narrowly focused on the person and the problem. We as a society and community, seem mostly interested in pointing the finger - blaming who is at fault - and telling people what they cannot do.

It’s not just the medical model of focusing on ADHD as a disease.  It’s not just the idea that ADHD necessitates struggle and challenge.  They might be part of it, but it’s a small piece.

To truly understand how ADHD is affecting a child, a parent, a married couple, and an entire family, we must pay attention to all the inter workings of what is going on.  We need to be aware of the inherent struggles that people face on a daily basis, ADHD or not!

To simply excuse a difficult marriage because a child has ADHD is unfortunate, and I personally feel that it’s misleading.  Simply as an example, we need to consider the following (before making a call either way):

  • Communication
  • Relationship
  • Responsibility
  • Love
  • Passion
  • Employment
  • Goals
  • Finances

All of these factors, and so much more influence where we devote our attention, and what we pay attention to the most.

ADHD is a serious condition that affects millions of people worldwide.  But it is just a label…  It is just a grouping of behaviors that exists among everything else we face in life.  To truly be successful, we must be aware of this influence, address everything in context, and remember that we do not define a child just because he or she has ADHD.

What Do You Think?

We’d love to hear from you. Go ahead and give us your thoughts in the comments below.

PS - Have you gotten your ADHD Essentials Audio Kit yet? Sign Up Today, it’s FREE

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